Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Mike's LiveJournal:

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Friday, September 23rd, 2005
3:25 am	For Further Updates, see cascade_vii Sometimes, you have to let go. As much as I abhor giving up, it looks like I have to. Knowing me, though, I’ll never COMPLETELY give up. Ha, quitting is for losers and people who don’t try. However, for now, somethings just have to become memories for now. But only for now. I have also decided along with this epiphany that my live-journal must be upgraded to suit my new college setting. Thus, radrepublican will be no more, only to have cascade_vii reborn from his ashes. I haven’t decided if I’ll save my entries or not. They all have an impact on me remind me fondly of times gone by. Then again, sometimes the past is just an anchor holding us back. Hmm...   ~We are a beautiful letdown~ Current Mood: cold (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, September 19th, 2005
11:22 pm	A Side Note... I’ve been 19 for one month now, and that is some scary stuff.  Reflecting back to what happened exactly a month ago stirs all sorts of emotions, both happy and sad.  It’s amazing what can happen in one month.  I just have to remember that just as much can change this month as last.  Maybe it’ll even change for the better.  Who knows?   ~Remember, Whatever It Seems Like Forever Ago~ (1 Comment |Comment on this)
11:16 pm	Car Rides, Country Legends, Introspective Talk, Mysterious Metaphors, and Riddles within Riddles Amazing how a lot can happen in the short time between entries, and yet can seem like absolutely nothing at the same time.    Saturday- Great time meeting up again with Norah, Emily, Dylan, and Luan.  Eventually met up with Brian and Kendall go to ride carnival rides and see Triptii, and then see Boondock Saints.  Good times all around.   Sunday- Family time and tearful good-byes.  Oye.  Like my emotions can take much more.   Monday- Woke up at 4 so I could get a plane back to KU in time for class.  BAH.  Today was actually full of interesting experiences, really.  On the shuttle from KCI to KU, I had a conversation with the driver on how people are afraid to help others because people have forgotten how to repay the kindness of others.  Apparently, this guy had hitchhiked his way around the nation when he was younger, and eventually decided to stick to the shuttle business because it’s what he loved: getting to meet people and being essentially his own boss on the road.  It certainly gave me perspective on myself and made me think of what I want to do with my life.  Of course, I have no idea, so that makes it difficult.  And when we weren’t talking, he would blast the Country Legends station with “the best country from the 60’s, 70’s, and 80’s,” and singing along, no less.  Actually, I found it quite humorous.  He seemed like a nice guy who loved what he did.   After that, class per usual.  Then, Kirsten and I went to see “The Brothers Grimm,” a sufficiently entertaining movie, if not very good in and of itself.  I really enjoyed myself, albeit some of the talk made me nervous.  Word riddles and mind games are a dangerous game and misinterpreting things leads to NOTHING good.  Albeit, as Freud said, “Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.”  So, who knows if any of the talk had double, triple, or dare I say, QUADRUPLE meanings.  Haha, I do know how to play that game too, and inserted my own little double meanings into things.  I found it kind of fun, if a little sad.  In the end, it means nothing.  But then again, where is the end, if any?  They say it’s the journey that means the most, not the end result.  Well, I, for one, want to see the freaking road in front of me to follow this so called "symbolic" journey.  I’m tired of chasing shadows and wandering blind.  But then again, what else can we do?   ~sometimes I wish someone out there will find me~   Current Mood: Searching Through Shadows... (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, September 17th, 2005
1:33 pm	The Easter Bunny Isn’t Real….*Pause*…Neither Is Santa. All woes are mended and all wrongs are righted, for I am back in Naperville! haHA! Or rather, everything will be right once I see everyone. Brian somehow didn’t end up in Naperville last night, and I promised that I wouldn’t have any fun until he got there. However, I was happy and amused seeing Kendall, Norah, Emily, and two new people from U of I Dylan and Luan. I finally felt home last night, making fun of each other and exchanging tales of mystery and intrigue all pertaining to college greatness. Does this mean that I’ve finally realized that while KU is fun and the people there are great, U of I is where I belong? Only time will tell. I asked a Magic 8 Ball what it thought to get a second opinion. Apparently, signs point to yes. Well, as said, we we’ll see. Current Mood: Everything Rocks! (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, September 15th, 2005
11:46 pm	Don't Cry, Emo Kid. It'll All Be Okay! Haha, it’s been one month and one day since I’ve been here, and being away from everyone is killing me. Absolutely killing me. I really like the people here, I really do. But frankly, nearly everyone at Naperville North knew me better. People I could count on, people I knew. Here, well, I just don’t know. Heh, normally, I’m able to stave off my loneliness until I’m alone in my room or walking alone or something, but it just hit me in a group of people, and that made it a ton worse. To be fair, I’m being social and I’m making good friends. Ha, I’ve even had two romantic dramas within the month. Too bad those two only made the loneliness worse. Oh well, I don’t blame them. It’s just the way it is. On the bright side, I’m coming home tomorrow. People from U of I are coming down to see me, and I couldn’t be happier. Well, I rephrase. I could be happier once I’m with them and everyone else. Current Mood: Alone (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Saturday, September 10th, 2005
11:56 am	A New Fad! YES! Fill out and reply to me....then i'll send it back if u want.. Would you? Will you? [_] give me your number? (_ _ _) _ _ _- _ _ _ _ [_] kiss me? [_] let me kiss you? [_] want to get in my pants? [_] watch a movie with me? [_] take me out to dinner? [_] let me drive you somewhere [_] take a shower with me? [_] have sex with me? [_] have a fling with me? [_] buy me a drink? [_] let me buy you a drink? [_] take me home for the night? [_] let me sleep in your bed? [_] Sing car karaoke w/ me? [_] re-post this for me to answer your questions? [_] give me a piggyback ride? [_] Come pick me up at 3 am because my car ran out of gas in the middle of nowhere [_] Lock me in your room and take advantage of me? [_] lick my cheek? [_] dance with me? [_] let me make you breakfast? [_] help me with homework? [_] tickle me? [_] let me tickle you? [_] stick up for me if i was being put down? [_] play strip poker with me? [_] get wasted with me? [_] instant message me? [_] greet me in public? [_] hang out with me? [_] bring me around your friends? D0 Y0U... [_] think im cute? [_] think im hot? [_] want to kiss me? [_] want to neck with me? [_] want to cuddle with me? [_] want to hook up with me? [_] want to have sex with me? AM i... [_] smart? [_] cute? [_] funny? [_] cool? [_] loveable? [_] adorable? [_] compassionate? [_] great to be with? [_] attractive? [_] mean? [_] odd? HAVE Y0U EVER... [_] thought about me sexually? [_] thought about hookin up with me? [_] found yourself wanting a kiss from me? [_] wished I were there? [_] grabbed me? [_] had a crush on me? [_] idolized me? [_] wanted my number? [_] had a dream about me? [_] been distracted by me? [_] wanted to have sex with me? ARE Y0U... [_] happy you know me? [_] mad at me? [_] thinkin about me? [_] going to repost this? Current Mood: Things Are More Clear (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, September 7th, 2005
2:26 pm	I'm A Guy, Why Aren't I Bottling My Emotions? Explaining how I feel is too much trouble. Here's some lyrics that are close. Shooting Stars by Cauterize is pretty good too. Maybe later. But hey, be glad. I'm actually updating this stupid thing. However, I think I may be redoing my lj name. "Radrepublican" will most likely be replaced by something else, which is undetermined at this time. Call me anytime, guys, I have unlimited long distance! BOO-YAH! Its breathtaking to think of you and to learn that sometimes the only way out is through its mind numbing to think of yesterday I’d run to you now if I could but things have changed (i heard you say) its enlightening to think of the breeze and to believe in things that we can't see (so here we go) lets show them how to live accept the pain always forgive watch the sun go down learn the sound of following all that is complete its breathtaking to think of you and to learn without faith that the sky isn't as blue its mind numbing to think of yesterday we'll look toward the stars and dream that we're airplanes I heard you say its enlightening to think of the breeze when you watch the sun set, think of me so here we go lets show them how to live accept the pain, always forgive watch the sun go down, learn the sound of following all that’s complete. Current Mood: still pensive (1 Comment |Comment on this)
8:41 am	I Follow, Follow Like Lemmings... Reply with your name and 1. I'll respond with something random about you. 2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you. 3. I'll pick a flavor of jello to wrestle with you in. 4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me. 5. I'll tell you my first memory of you. 6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of. 7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you. 8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal. You MUST. It is written. Current Mood: pensive (17 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, September 5th, 2005
7:33 pm	College makes my life confusing. Commentary later Click here. Take the quiz. Post your results. ( See radrepublican's results. ) Current Mood: Frustrated (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, August 13th, 2005
2:29 am	I'm Not Ready For This... I think seeing the tears and good byes of my best friends in the world have brought home the fact that I’m going to college in 4 hours.  I don’t know if I’m ready, God, I really don’t know if I’m ready...     Too bad it really doesn’t matter at this stage, does it?  Time marches on, per usual.  Keep in touch guys; I’m only a phone call away.  And remember, it’s never good-bye.              ~For what it's worth, it was worth all the while...~   Current Mood: Scared, Hopeful, and Loved (14 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, August 7th, 2005
2:08 am	Nightmare Senario Oh...shit.... Fuck, why must everything go to fucking pieces with no time left till college. I mean, really. Uggg....time to get the salvage crew and see what pieces of real friendships can be saved instead of the damned sham ones. Ah well. Heh, funny part is, I have only 5 days left here. So...if any of y'all want to do anything, call me. I'm super busy, but I can always fit more people in. Sleep is for the weak. Current Mood: BAH! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, June 26th, 2005
4:29 pm	"How happy is the blameless vestal's lot! The world forgetting, by the world forgot. Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind! Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd; Labour and rest, that equal periods keep; "Obedient slumbers that can wake and weep;" Desires compos'd, affections ever ev'n, Tears that delight, and sighs that waft to Heav'n." -Eloisa to Abelard by Alexander Pope What happened, happened, and I won’t forget it, no matter what anyone says. However, I have let go. Let go of my love, my pain, and my hate. So that, as they say, is that. Current Mood: blank (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, June 15th, 2005
6:23 pm	The Sun Burns! SECTION 1 ABOUT YOURSELF + Known as: Mike + Lives in: Naperville, about to be Lawrence, Kansas + First Breath: August 19th, 1986 + School: Naperville North Alumnus, soon to be student of the University of Kansas + Ethnicity: 3/8 German, 1/4 English, 1/8 French, 1/8 Russian, 1/8 Mexican + Religion: Roman Catholic + Shoe size: 13 + Hair color: Brown w/ Blonde Highlights + Eye color: Hazel, more green than anything else + Style: Anywhere between punk to prep + Fears: Letting the people I love get hurt, forgetting the things I love, growing up SECTION 2 HAVE YOU EVER... + Cheated on someone? No + Been Cheated on? I hope not + Fallen off the bed? Scared the shit out of me + broken someone`s heart?: Maybe? + Had your heart broken? Hahaha...uggg... + Had a dream come true? Sure + Done something you regret? Yes SECTION 3 CURRENTLY... + Wearing? Stanford Shirt, Billabong jeans, Dr Seuss. ‘Nuf said + Listening to? Hotel California remix by Reel Big Fish (I think) + Located? My computer. + Chatting with? No-one + Watching? Last thing I watched was Law and Order + Should REALLY be doing? Seeing Batman Begins SECTION 4 DO YOU... + Brush your teeth?: People who don’t are gross. + Like anybody? Yep. + Have any piercings? No + Have any Tattoos? Blah + Drive? Driving is cool + Drink? No + Smoke? No and never. Is gross and WILL kill you. If you, reading this, RIGHT NOW smoke...stop. Really. + Got a pager? Nah SECTION 6 THE LAST PERSON YOU... + Hugged?: Sherri Herzog + Kissed?: My mommy! + IMed? Ian Fijolek + Talked on the phone? Norah, I think. + Yelled at? The god-damned archery stands at work. SECTION 7 PERSONAL... + What do you want to be when you grow up? Right now? A lawyer, I guess. + What has been the best day of your life? Probably a day at Philmont, but could be another. Most likely a day camping, though. + What comes first in your life?: My family + Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend/crush?: That’s kind of complicated at the moment. Ask again later. + What are you most scared of?: My family and friends dying. + What do you usually think about before you go to bed? Right now? “Wow, this sunburn really hurts.” Most of the time? The people who matter most. + Did you lose someone you really loved?: Yeah. + Love your family? We fight a lot, but I love them from the bottom of my heart. + Love your friends? I’d give my life for them. SECTION 8 FAVORITE... + Movie: Garden State, Mean Girls, Eurotrip, Anchorman, Saved, The Shaweshank Redemption + Song: At the moment? Wish You Were Here by Incubus + Group: Story of the Year, Incubus, The Ataris, Switchfoot, Something Corporate + Store: Village Discount, I'm such a dork + Sport: A shooting sport. Archery or Shotgun. + Ice Cream Flavor: Chocolate. The more chocolate the better. + Fruit: Strawberries! + Candy: The old gummi warheads. Don’t make them anymore though. + Holiday: Christman + Day of the Week: Saturday + Time: 1:00 AM + Color: Some shade of blue, its dark, and possibly metallic with a touch of green. + Name for a Girl: Kerry or Karin + Name for a Boy: Taylor or Nick SECTION 9 DO YOU... + Like to give hugs?: Yeah + Like to give kisses?: Yep + Like to walk in the rain?: Hellsa yeah + Prefer black or blue pens?: Black + Like to travel?: Yeah, especially to natural parks. I love nature. + Sleep on your side, tummy or back?: I roll and thrash so much that it really don’t matter. + Think you're attractive?: Sure, but not when I’m sunburnt out the crazy + Have a goldfish?: Not goldfish, a beta. Jack. + Ever have the falling dream? My scariest dream ever was a falling dream. + Have stuffed animals? My republican elephant, my sock monkey, and my armadillos, but none are really ‘stuffed’ actually... SECTION 11 THIS OR THAT... + Pierced nose or tongue? Nose + Single or taken? Taken + MTV or BET? MTV + 7th Heaven or Dawson's Creek? Haven’t seen either. + Sugar or salt? Sugar + Silver or gold? Silver is good, Platinum is better. + Chocolate or flowers? Flowers + Color or Black-and-white photos? Color, as it expresses the vibrancy of life through color. + Stay up late or sleep in? Stay up late. + Hot or cold? Cold + Sun or moon? Moon + Left or Right? Right + 10 Acquaintances or one best friend? One best friend, no question. Quality over quantity. + Mustard or ketchup? Depends on what I’m eating. Plain? Ketchup. Who eats mustard raw? + Spring or Fall? Spring + Happy or sad? Happy + Wonder or amazement? Wonder + McDonald's or Burger King? McDonalds + Mexican or Italian food? MEXICAN! I love Mex! + Lights on or off? off + Pepsi or Coke? Coke. Pepsi is much to sweet. Current Mood: Waiting (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, June 12th, 2005
10:52 pm	I really wish people would be more honest with me about how they feel, especially when they are really important to me... I don’t really know what to think. I do need sleep, however, as work starts tomorrow. Maybe, hopefully, that’ll keep my mind off things. Current Mood: Hurt and Confused (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, May 22nd, 2005
11:18 pm	My Emotional Bottle Is Fizzing Over! This has to be single-handedly the most chaotic, emotion bloated time of my life. About every feeling that can be felt hits me about 3 times a day. It’s all very confusing and my boy instinct to bottle these emotions isn’t going well, as my emotion-bottle is overflowing. Fizzing over one might say. I’ve determined that I’m going to shout out whatever emotion I feel the moment I feel it to keep better track of how I feel. Perhaps by the end of the week, life will have straightened out. Speaking of this week, does anyone else have about everything that could possibly be due for a class due for this week? I have finals for almost every class this week and projects that count as finals due this week as well. Speaking of, I just finished my humanities project on Swing Dancing, which should be loads of laughs for tomorrow. It’ll be great! What won’t be great is Business Law and the court case for tomorrow, which I am completely unprepared for. ARG. One a final note: the event that takes the prize for most emotional has to be One Acts, which were great may I add. Well, at least mine was, I dunno about the others, as my I couldn’t bring myself to watch all the really depressing ones. In any case, this was my last theater function at North, and I have very conflicting feelings about it. On one hand, I love it. On the other hand, I hate it. However, that doesn’t change the fact I love it and will miss it dearly, and especially the people. Everyone has been so great and I will deeply miss you all in all of the glory that theater brings. The shameful, yet shameless glory. As for the cast party, well, I think Laura Mac put it best: “The air was so thick with sweat and teenage lust and post-show thrill that I could practically swim through it.” Superb. My final take on theater will be tomorrow night at the theater banquet. I wonder if any long standing drama will be resolved. Perhaps. Perhaps not. We will see. Current Mood: Emotional Maelstrom (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, May 9th, 2005
3:26 am	I Am Strong...Strong Like Bull! I’d like to point out the time of this entry first off. Second off, I feel actually pretty good. Granted, that could be from the enormous amount of caffeine I’ve put into my system. Anyways, this is just my update to allow myself to go to freaking sleep. I’d like to thank this homework session to Mountain Dew, my iPod, some friends who kept me going when times seemed bleak, and, of course, Douglas Adams and Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy for providing random 10 minute reading breaks to keep me sane and laughing. Now, if you all will excuse me, I need to go die somewhere. Preferably my bed, but at this point it really doesn’t matter. Current Mood: Too Tired For Human Emotion (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 3rd, 2005
9:36 pm	I Guess It's Who I Am Your brain: 200% interpersonal, 60% visual, 120% verbal, and 20% mathematical! Congratulations on being 400% smart! Actually, on my test, everyone is. The above score breaks down what kind of thinking you most enjoy doing. A score above 100% means you use that kind of thinking more than average, and a score below 100% means you use it less. It says nothing about how good you are at any one, just how interested you are in each, relatively. A substantial difference in scores between two people means, conclusively, that they are different kinds of thinkers. Matching Summary: Each of us has different tastes. Still, I offer the following advice, which I think is obvious: Don't date someone if your interpersonal percentages differ by more than 80%. Don't be friends with someone if your verbal percentages differ by more than 100%. Don't have sex with someone if their math percentage is over 200%. My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 99% on interpersonal You scored higher than 63% on visual You scored higher than 89% on verbal You scored higher than 13% on mathematical Link: The 4-Variable IQ Test written by chriscoyne on Ok Cupid Current Mood: Tired (Comment on this)
Sunday, April 24th, 2005
11:35 am	Life Needs to Slow Down...NOW So, I’m not dead, as my lack of updating would indicate. However, I have been very stressed out and on the verge of melting down, so perhaps the two are one in the same. School has been laying down the proverbial law and Anything Goes has not been going as well as planned. Combine this with the fact that I’ll be graduating in a little more than a month and you have a hodgepodge of emotions. However, to cover everything right now would be foolery, seeing as I would have to write pages to discuss what’s been in my head for the past month, so I’ll just leave y’all with a quiz thing instead! Oh, and come see Anything Goes (North Musical) on Friday or Sunday. You can see me do things. Funny things! It’ll be great! Advanced Global Personality Test Results Extraversion |||||||||||||||||| 80% Stability |||||||||||||||| 63% Orderliness |||||| 26% Empathy |||||||||||||||| 70% Interdependence |||||| 30% Intellectual |||||||||||||||| 70% Mystical |||||||||||| 50% Artistic |||||| 23% Religious |||||||||||||||||| 76% Hedonism |||| 16% Materialism |||||||||||||||| 70% Narcissism |||||||||||||| 56% Adventurousness |||||||||||||||||| 76% Work ethic |||||||||||| 43% Self absorbed |||||||||| 36% Conflict seeking |||||||||||||||| 70% Need to dominate |||||||||||| 50% Romantic |||||||||||||||| 70% Avoidant |||||| 30% Anti-authority |||||||||||||||| 70% Wealth |||||||||||||||| 63% Dependency |||||||||| 36% Change averse |||||||||||| 50% Cautiousness |||||||||||||||| 70% Individuality |||||||||| 36% Sexuality |||||||||||| 43% Peter pan complex |||||||||||||| 56% Physical security |||||||||||||||||| 76% Food indulgent |||||||||||| 43% Histrionic |||||||||||||||| 63% Paranoia |||||||||||| 43% Vanity |||||||||||||||| 70% Hypersensitivity |||||||||||| 43% Female cliche |||||| 23% Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test personality tests by similarminds.com Current Mood: Overwhelmed (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 6th, 2005
8:24 pm	I Think I'm Cold Blooded.... I swear, whenever it’s warm, I get the urge to sit in the sun and do nothing. Perhaps I am a descendant of a race of lizardmen who ruled the Earth for untold ages. Or I’m just tired of school and want nothing more to do with any of it. For example, Calculus. Why did Martina assign so much homework for all of April? I haven’t done homework all year, and now this? I’m gonna die! Besides, we should be trying to enjoy spring and the Seniors should be enjoying their last days here at North. Giving us this much homework just earns my ire. On the bright side, seeing everyone I don’t hang out with at all has made the home stretch a little more bearable. Plus, getting to know more people and becoming much better friends with people just sweetens the deal. On the bright side, on Monday I got to have people over until about 11:00. Getting to be a writhing mass on my trampoline was much fun. Only problem was U of I lost. Why must every team I cheer for lose? *dies*...but that would be too easy. And what’s the fun if something’s easy? Hehe..heh…uggg... To Calculus! Current Mood: Doing...THINGS...sucks... (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 29th, 2005
12:30 pm	Spring Break-izzle! Spring Break! Booyah! So far, it’s been great! I’ve been meeting new people on a fairly regular basis, which is quite exciting. However, I haven’t seen many of the people who actually might be reading this. Thus, I expect you all to call me so we can hang out. I will attempt to do the same, but I’m sure I’ll forget someone, so don’t leave it up to me. Despite how awesome Break has been so far, it hasn’t been very exciting, per say. Oh, and apparently, a bunch of Benet people have Xangas. We, having Livejournals, must declare war on them and bring Benet to its knees. In any case, gimmie a call. Now. Called me yet? Current Mood: Bouncy (4 Comments |Comment on this)